We are sitting in the living room at nine o’clock in the morning. Olde dad is having his first cup of tea. I am having my first cup of coffee. Olde dad had not yet put his teeth in. I have not yet put my eyes in.

– You know where is bread. You know where is turkey, says olde dad.

– Yeah. I’ll just have a banana for breakfast.

– Ah.

– Have you got your choppers in yet?

– What?

– Have you got your choppers in yet?

I know olde dad’s choppers don’t go in till 9.30 but you’ve got to ask to oil the wheels of conversation.

– You know where bread is, you know where turkey is, says olde dad again, as though it is some saying of the ancient world.

– Ah, I say.

– What are you having for breakfast?

– I’ll just have a banana.

– What time is it?

– Half-past nine.

– Ah! What are you having for breakfast?

– I’ll just have a banana.

– Have honeyhoops.

– A banana’s all right for me. I think I might have another cup of coffee though.  Push the boat out.

David comes down from the bathroom.

– You had breakfast? asks olde dad.

– I had some toast.

– You know where bread is, you know where turkey is.

David asks me: What are you having?

– I’ll just have a banana, I say

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